Lost In That Feeling


I was lost in the light the morning I took this photo….the shadows and the light… the things that were seen in the wood grain……

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trying not to forget why I was looking for more in the photo….trying not to get to caught up in learning more about my camera…trying to hold on to why I take pictures….I have almost come to the point of not taking more of the classes…Lost in the feeling was what speaks to you in a photo …this photo was about the spirit of the light playing on the wood that morn ….

Still Standing MOM …..I AM STILL STANDING……

Of what value are you to someone…..???


Of what value are you to someone…..???Back in 2009 I joined Facebook …..many had said “You will lose your personal info …there are mast murders….hackers will steal things…. don’t join…..But I joined anyway ….I had the best Farmville farm without paying and I could find eggs with the top egg hunters….but best of all is the fact that news travels on Facebook faster than a speeding light from heaven…….DSC_0558_filteredCouple nights back a friend on Facebook told us that she was dying ….the way she told us and the things she told us ….were heart tearing ..belly deep tears welled up in  me …..I meet this lady on the river banks of the Chena River ….we were both taking photos of the racers ….her and her husband were there with their Friend Manny the Monkey …. we did not meet per the normal…. Howdy, Happy to meet you ….no she had turned to adjust her camera and slipped and fell…as I started toward her …she jumped up and dusted the snow off and turn back to business…. DSC_0564_filteredManny the Monkey was how I found her on Facebook …she cooks an awesome looking meals and shares the photos …her and Manny watch football and she loves to take photos that she shares….that is as close as we have gotten for actually meeting…when she told us all the other night of her new journey of life …I CRIED worst than I did when My mother passed over…..she talked about how she would be the auroras that danced in the sky…..last night as I stood under the lights I remember her word ….and the words of an elder native man the first time I every saw the lights  DSC_0566_filtered….We had gone shopping and were at the old Fred Myers I was standing and looking up and telling the children to look …the elder man stopped ….he asks if it was my first time seeing the lights ..I said yes …he said it is your family that has passed over speaking of their joy …..when my Facebook friend said the following ...”This will be my last season to dance under the aurora, because next season, I shall dance WITH them, among those who have gone on before me”

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Family comes in so many forms and so many colors….I am so happy I did not listen to the nay sayers…because I came to know this awesome family I have on Facebook….

“Oh, the comfort — the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person — having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together; certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then with the breath of kindness blow the rest away.” ~Dinah Craik, A Life for a Life, 1859

I am still Standing MOM …I AM STANDING …….

Face Within You


Last time I was out shooting auroras … we were chasing them down the road….this was one I could see a face in the lights but it needed a little help to define and a lot of help to get rid of noise caused from such a high iso setting…..

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I played around in Picasa3 for a while then I took it over to another program ….the face within just doesn’t want to be seen straight on by the eyes…..wants to play like a little night imp…

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it has beeen a long time since I have had a chance to shoot …ice storms,extreme cloudy nights and just plain out lazy me….the inner me wants to go every night but the old fat lady does not want to move….

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the inner face …the inner us…the one screaming for better of times and things…… but not screaming loud enough to make a difference ….

Still Standing MOM…I AM STILL STANDING……

From Early Morn TO Lights of the Night


Waiting in the truck at VA Hospital ….is always fun ..I have time to study setting on camera and play around with the things the camera can do…..this morn the parking lot was really crowded and we had to park in a non parking space …which put the truck in a valley some what…I went to step down out of truck ….wrong thing …my trifocals and the depth of the valley was a big fall…..good thing it was a soft snow pack….I had to really think getting up and back in truck….. I tried real hard not to laugh at others as they did the same thing….

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the lights again appeared and hubbby took me down the road to chase them ….but first daughter called on her way home …lights are dancing mom she says……grab your camera … we stood outside and turned round and round trying hard to capture the lights …the sky was ablaze with lights……..

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than husband started truck and i grabbed tripod and camera and remote and off we went ….first stop the small lake n farm road in Moose Creek Alaska

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back in the truck and just a little further down the highway and we stopped at dump area right before the gift store Knotty Shop and it was dark and the auroras were again building and making herself known

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back in the truck …..now we were back home and the lights were just fading away but could still be seen by human eyes….. what an awesome night …..

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What a night and day….even managed to get in a adult nap or two…..
STILL STANDING MOM ….I AM STILL STANDING …..

“Honor Our Veterans Please; An Open Letter to the VA”


“Honor Our Veterans Please; An Open Letter to the VA” by @TanayaLanning on @LinkedIn https://t.co/tJmDCjU6dO

Today my blog belongs to a Facebook Friend …..please be so kind as to reblog and keep this going…….

First about my camera the trip it had last night …hang tight it all will blend into the story of my friend and her father…. I tell you …. the data for the northern lights was really firing up and I wanted to capture them ….. so I grabbed everything and head out the door…but first had to do a walk about because of moose hubby had seen earlier….all clear we can shoot….what is this the new remote with timer is shooting when I don’t want it to….so back in house ….checking disks the shots the camera was taking by itself were there the shots I had pushed the remote for were not…..time for bed….no sleep just night mares of the timer ..and a voice that kept saying ” not your turn mine” …..need sleep because we were suppose to go and have hubby’s third pair of hearing aids checked ….VA gives him hearing aids but won’t listen to him when he has trouble with them…..they give him the best but they won’t or don’t listen when he tries to describe the pain ….they just give him a different type of hearing aids….. so here we are and here is my Facebook friends open letter….

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Honor Our Veterans Please; An Open Letter to the VA
Dear Veterans Affairs,
It is 4:21 am, local time in Tucson, Arizona. I am writing to you from the Quality Inn where you send the Veterans that you serve to stay when they are here for care at the Southern Arizona Veterans Affairs Health Care System (SAVAHCS). I don’t live in Tucson and I am not a Veteran. I am the daughter of a Vietnam Veteran who is in your care. I live in Seattle, Washington. I find myself here today because my father is fighting for his life in your ICU ward. I am writing to you today because your bureaucracy is incredibly frustrating and quite frankly, your customer service sucks. I believe that you can do better for our Vets and their families when they are in your care. My hope is that you will want to.
I will keep it straight forward and to the point, or in this case, to the bullet points:
Clearly Communicate – My Dad is currently intubated and on a ventilator, but he is also awake, coherent and scared to death without being able to talk, however he can write to communicate his needs. It only takes about two minutes in the room with him to know this. But he’s also hard of hearing, as most Vets his age are because they went to war without the benefit of hearing protection. Yet when your staff comes into his room, the majority will talk at him from the foot of his bed or farther away. It takes less than a minute to walk to the head of his bed, make eye contact with him and speak to him and treat him like a respected person who is expected to improve. But when you talk at him and he can’t hear you, then you walk away or start a procedure, he still doesn’t know what’s happening or why because he hasn’t clearly been told, then he gets scared, agitated and sicker because his heart rate goes up and his blood pressure becomes unstable. Then you have to work for a much longer period of time to get him calmed back down and resting again. Always remember there is a person inside that body that you are working on and clearly communicate with them.
Listen to your Patients – My Dad knows what’s going on inside his body better than anyone else. He knows where he hurts, where he’s uncomfortable, what his needs are, so why won’t you listen to him? You intubated him and put him on a ventilator and left him awake but you never gave him a way to communicate with you. It wasn’t until I asked a nurse for a communicator sheet (the laminated sheet with symptoms that a patient can point at to express their needs and symptoms) that one was provided and then it still took me having to ask again four times before the communicator sheet actually materialized in the room. We had to also ask for paper so he could write to communicate. Always remember to listen to your patients.
Make Patient Advocates Available 24/7 – Our bad luck is to be in your care over a Federal Holiday and a weekend. You are a 24/7 facility and your critical services, should be available 24/7 to support that mission. There has already been several moments where a patient advocate would be greatly beneficial and allow for my Mother and me to trust that someone was also looking out for my Dad’s best interests, but apparently your patient advocate office is only open during normal business hours, so who can a patient or their family members turn to for help in all of the other hours that your staff is providing care? Who do we talk to about the nurse who was clearly much more concerned because her kids were sick and other personal life matters than she was about providing top quality care to ICU patients? The nurse who tied my Dad down so he couldn’t even gesture to communicate before I got there to advocate on his behalf. Patient Advocates should be available on-call 24/7 just like your healthcare is.
Medical Protocols are in place for a reason – You performed a procedure on my Dad in his room yesterday and one protocol is that his charge nurse must be in the room when these procedures are done; except your Doctor started without her. My Dad knows your protocols. He listens to what you tell him and he holds you accountable to follow through on what you say and to follow the protocols you have in place. When you don’t, you damage his trust in you and the care you are providing him. If you have a protocol, follow it.
Tell the Truth – My Dad needs to believe what you say to him so that he can rest and focus on getting better. You are making it really hard for him to believe you because every time you come into his room you tell him something different. One person says “It’s good when we make you cough during suction.” then the next person says “It’s not good when we make you cough during suction.”, so then my Dad wants to know which is it? What is the truth? This is just one of many, many examples that I myself have been witness to and heard firsthand. Every time you change your story, he gets more scared and loses trust in you and the care you are providing him. If you want your patients to get better, always tell the truth.
A Box of Tissues goes a long way – It’s the little things that people will remember and that will leave a lasting impression. Something as simple as making sure there’s a box of tissues in the family waiting area would make our time in that room bearable. It would show your compassion, your understanding that the people in that room will probably shed a few tears before their time there is done. Always keep a box of tissues in the waiting areas.
I will close by saying that I think that your staff is full of great, talented, competent people but somewhere you are losing sight of your stated Mission, Vision and Values and by default causing great people to provide bad service. Here’s your Mission, Vision and Values as a reminder (source, http://www.tucson.va.gov/about/index.asp):
Mission
We provide Quality Healthcare to Veterans in an environment of Compassion, Education & Research.
Vision
Be a national model of clinical and organizational excellence by providing SAFE, EFFECTIVE, EFFICIENT and COMPASSIONATE healthcare.
Core Values
Integrity: Act with high moral principle. Adhere to the highest professional standards. Maintain the trust and confidence of all with whom I engage.
Commitment: Work diligently to serve Veterans and other beneficiaries. Be driven by an earnest belief in VA’s mission. Fulfill my individual responsibilities and organizational responsibilities.
Advocacy: Be truly Veteran-centric by identifying, fully considering, and appropriately advancing the interests of Veterans and other beneficiaries.
Respect: Treat all those I serve and with whom I work with dignity and respect. Show respect to earn it.
Excellence: Strive for the highest quality and continuous improvement. Be thoughtful and decisive in leadership, accountable for my actions, willing to admit mistakes, and rigorous in correcting them.
Sincerely,
Tanaya M. Lanning
the original story was on her Linkedin page

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/honor-our-veterans-please-open-letter-va-tanaya-lanning

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“Our country is not the only thing to which we owe our allegiance. It is also owed to justice and to humanity. Patriotism consists not in waving the flag, but in striving that our country shall be righteous as well as strong.” ~James Bryce

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“Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.” ~Winston Churchill

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“Our country is not the only thing to which we owe our allegiance. It is also owed to justice and to humanity. Patriotism consists not in waving the flag, but in striving that our country shall be righteous as well as strong. ” ~James Bryce

 

Still Standing MOM  ..I am still standing ……

Way To COLD


Sometimes I am way too taken with the night lights….even when the temps are way below normal for humans …..I am out there …even though it is not far from front door.. still dangerous…if one slips and fall while out alone ….who will come to the rescue .. how soon will they check…..I am really getting silly in my old age …I have let so much pass me by…I did not do certain things when I was raising my children….one because we were to far from family …two who else would take care of kids if something happen ….still have not even learned to asks correctly for one to stop so the photo can be taken while not moving….it was 44 below aero the night theses were taken everything made silly clunk…..clunk sound …..today it is above the zero mark and we are headed out the door to take eggs to store……

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sometimes Mom I wonder why i am still standing …BUT…I AM STILL STANDING MOM …

Away from Here


Sometimes the walls of this house become way to tight…..we waited and waited…. it was either black ice road conditions or extreme temps…. either side of the zero on the gauge can be extremely dangerous…but we finally caught it just right even though it was cold ….really cold….so off we go the wheels on the truck went thump ,thump thump till they warmed up

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the weather and steam off everything trying to work was amazing….every steam plant was working over time and the thermal pools on the rivers and lakes were steaming up the air….

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around every bend in the road was another vista of beauty…..snow covered sun shadowed and sun light were our views …roads were both icy or dry …depending on the bend in the road ….some views many,many,miles away looked like they were sitting in middle of roadway….

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the amount of snow and weight of more hoar-frost and the extreme temps made the trees and grasses look like place from another world….. the stop sign seem to even scream Stop Already Winter……the sounds at these temps seems to triple in volume…the crunch of the icy snow seems to have its own music…

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we viewed moose and caribou and eagles along the way….the moose were so hungry they were down on their knees eating last years grass stubs and the caribou seem to think that my camera was a sign saying heads down ….the eagles photo was taken while truck was in motion but it was not as out of focus as I thought it would be…..they were all busy feeding ….
we made it back home before sunset
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it was maddening trying to capture the sunset while truck was moving …we could not stop because of afternoon traffic off base…….but we were back home and happy to have had a beautiful day of travel ….
Still standing MOM …Still Standing

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