Lost In Many ways

It took me 45 minutes to get here this morn…use to old form …quick ,easy ,friendly….but change has happen again to the internet ….I am so tire of this fast pace..firm believer if it is not broken leave it to hell alone..do not need to be impressed by new things any longer at my age ..want stable things that last a little longer then two nano seconds……still trying to figure out where one hangs their heart when both parents are gone…feeling bad about not feeling the pain of another who went through this right by my side…this world just seems to be moving out of my reach ….wanting to run but not knowing where to run….reading a joke the other day and laughing til my sides hurt …picking up phone to share the joke only to realize the one I wanted to share with was gone ..both from me and the world…hard to wrap mind around camera and family …like walking down a long empty hole in ground ….

But picking up the camera ,,,clicking right or wrong..deleting a lot …. do what has to be done around house leaving many things undone….once read a little ditty ..when like this ….dust and dirt will always be there but human contact will not …which do you desire ..clean or cling ….wishing I had clung more …have time now …so house work and life in fast pace world somehow don’t seem important today …..

This photo how I feel ..here but not here ….but then

I know I still am here for I can leave my print and feel the pain ….maybe tomorrow all will change …..

7 am here… dear friend ,I have been awake since 2 am ..not thinking of much and trying less…looks like a cloudy overcast day again today …with chill in air….leaves of gold are all but gone…one can feel the snow on the horizon but pray for it’s delay….needing a camera buddy back here soon  for I am running out of ideas… hoping your camera time is better


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